This habit is dangerous, and not uncommon. The unique ways in which men experience mental and physical problems and the stereotypes they face should not be ignored. But are men bad at self-care, and if so, how can this be improved?

Not taking it seriously

If you are a man going through a tough time in your life and are finding it hard to open up about your feelings, you’re not alone. Men are less likely to access psychological therapies than women. Only 36% of referrals to NHS talking therapies are for men.

But this issue is not exclusive to mental health or professional help. Being in denial about health issues makes communicating with your partner virtually impossible. In fact, research shows that 40% of men in the UK have never spoken to anyone about their mental health at all, this is around thirteen million people.

Men appear to have an attitude towards their health that it’ll pass. This can have serious consequences, and often their partner will need to step in.

Graham’s story

As a community pharmacist, Graham Brack ought to have known better when he had a fall and his oxygen levels went down to 92. But despite being unable to stand up, and being low on oxygen, Graham still believed “if they took me home and warmed me up I’d be okay.”

He had been lying on a concrete floor for more than an hour, causing him to become hypothermic. In the end, Graham’s wife called an ambulance in spite of Graham’s protestations. “In those circumstances trying to claim you’re fine when you can’t stand up isn’t going to fly.

“Part of her argument was that when O2 declines our brains don’t work well so I didn’t know what I was doing.”

On reflection, Graham realised “I wasn’t taking into account the effects of my condition on her, or our son who did a fabulous first aid job on me (at the age of 12).” However, he was thinking about how going into hospital would affect his family.

“I genuinely thought it would pass. But I think I was also aware that if I went to hospital that would cause major disturbance to the family and put a lot of pressure on my wife”

Don’t make it your partner’s responsibility

Although it may be hard to see the problem with keeping your feelings to yourself, often it’s the things you don’t say that create conflict within a loving relationship. This can leave your partner picking up the pieces. Is it fair to give your partner responsibility they didn’t ask for?

Josie Brooks is one of many women frustrated by this particular male tendency. She shared a terrifying anecdote.

Josie’s husband already had a history of heart issues. Once, on their way to a local market, she was so concerned about him that she finally had to order him to stop the car. When they went to a cafe to get some coffee, Josie called 999 in secret. Her husband got up and ran away (yes, you read that right), “He said he would be alright once home and refused to stop,” she said. After passing by two hospitals and rejecting the help he desperately needed, Josie once again rang 999.

The paramedics arrived shortly after. They “confirmed he was having a heart attack, and administered urgent care, whilst waiting for the ambulance,” she said. This was his second heart attack. They lost him for a brief amount of time, before restarting his heart.

” They took him in, and I had to watch, unable to do anything”

Understandably, Josie is furious and confused as to what possible reasons are behind this sense of denial. Why is it so hard to take care of yourself? What is stopping you from admitting you’re not okay?

In this instance and countless others, the fear of speaking out almost took his life. So, how can we create a culture where is it okay for men to accept help?

Why do men hide their feelings?

In an attempt to answer this question, I spoke to Dr. Elena Touroni, a consultant psychologist and co-founder of The Chelsea Psychology Clinic.

Mental health and physical health are undoubtably intertwined. Once impacts the other. Understanding men’s mental health may shed light on their denial of physical issues too.

“Vulnerability is (wrongly) seen as a weakness instead of the strength that it is.”

Why do men feel they have to hide their feelings? Why is it so normalised for men to keep things to themselves? Dr. Touroni gave us some professional insight into this. “We have ingrained cultural stereotypes about how men should and shouldn’t behave in society. A key part of this is the belief that men should be seen to be “strong” and manage their emotions” she said.

“Vulnerability is (wrongly) seen as a weakness instead of the strength that it is. Unfortunately, this can sometimes stop men from being open about their mental health and seeking support.”

So naturally, my next question was what is it that they are keeping inside? Perhaps if we can understand some of the overall issues behind the surface, we can offer some help and compassion.

How to spot when men are struggling

“Anxiety, depression, work-related stress, and relationship difficulties tend to be the most presenting issues. When struggling, men – as well as women – may turn to unhealthy coping mechanisms in an attempt to cope e.g. drinking too much.”

She also said, “whilst many of the symptoms of different mental health issues tend to be the same between men and women, there can also be subtle differences. For example, alongside the usual symptoms, depression can also manifest in men as some of the following: increased irritability, anger problems and escapism (playing video games for hours or working excessively)”

So, how does this affect the environment around them?

“When someone is struggling, it’s only natural that this will have an impact on other areas of their lives too, especially when it comes to their relationships. They might become more irritable, short-tempered, help out less or become shut down or distant from their partner. If you suspect your partner might be struggling, guiding them towards the most appropriate help is the best thing you can do.”

Would you try microdosing to improve mental health?

Helpful links

There are many ways to help a man in your life going through a hard time. Here are some links you may find useful:

Lloyd’s Pharmacy ‘Supporting men’s mental health’ 

Time to change ‘How to support men with mental health problems’

Medical news today ‘Man up is not the answer’

Studies used

Mental health in older adults 

The connection between physical and mental health

Millie Owens

www.titlemedia.co.uk

The post Are men bad at self-care? appeared first on Silver Magazine.

Take our picnic quiz and let’s really test your picnic knowledge…

How well do you know your picnic trivia?

July is the month of the picnic! But how much do you really know about this yummy summer tradition...

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Millie Owens

www.titlemedia.co.uk

The post Picnic quiz! How is your picnic trivia knowledge? appeared first on Silver Magazine.

Keep your braincells limbered up with our Silver Magazine General Knowledge Quiz. We’ve made it slightly harder this time…

General knowledge quiz June 2022

Can you smash this general knowledge quiz? Put your thinking cap on while you tackle these tricky questions...

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If you found this easy, challenge your friends by sharing! Or maybe this was too hard for you?

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Millie Owens

www.titlemedia.co.uk

The post Silver Magazine general knowledge quiz – June appeared first on Silver Magazine.

Have you ever wondered how you can help to save the oceans?

It is easy to feel inadequate and useless next to a problem so large. But this is far from the truth; the ‘average’ person can make a big difference to the environment. And yes, that means you.

The smallest of differences to your lifestyle and daily tasks can make a huge impact on the world we live in. So how can we help save the oceans?

Here are five easy changes you can make:

1. Shopping for sustainable seafood options

Start by making sure the fish you are purchasing has been harvested using safe methods.

Overfishing means that there are not enough of a fish species left to sustain a healthy population, and this can take decades to rectify. In some cases, where a fish species is removed from an environment, the whole ecosystem can collapse.

Buying fish sustainably reduces overfishing, maintains marine biodiversity and often contains more vitamins and minerals, which means it helps us too.

Do these things…

– Check for an MSC (Marine Stewardship Council) label, this blue tick means that the fish is considered to have been fished at a sustainable level.

– Ask your fishmonger – They are required to tell you everything they know about the fish they are selling.

– The Marine Conservation Society uses scientific research to provide consumers with information about marine life. Every year they create a Fish Guide to help you make sustainable choices about your fish.

2. Plastic free alternatives

Single use plastics such as plastic bottles can last up to 500 years in the ocean. These are some easy adjustments you can make to reduce this damage and save marine life…

– Carry a reusable water bottle instead of buying plastic bottles on a day or night out.

– Avoid plastic cutlery and straws, invest in metal straws.

– Take a cloth bag with you when you leave to do your food shop

– It may be a shock to find out that chewing gum actually contains plastic. This means you can recycle it!

3. Making easy and yummy seafood swaps

Through this website you can choose the fish or seafood you’d like to eat, and you will be provided with the best alternatives in terms of taste, sustainability, nutrition and price. Making small changes such as sources and variety of seafood can reduce the over-farming and production of specific species.

Here are some quick examples:

– Buying cod produced in the UK is currently an extremely unsustainable option. So if you do fancy cod for dinner, look for cod that has been caught in the waters surrounding Iceland, as the stocks are still healthy.

– Scallops and mussels farmed in the UK are great because they have a low environmental impact. So are an amazing alternative to prawns imported from other countries.

– Popular fish such as salmon and tuna are often farmed intensively. So go for healthier and eco-friendly options like trout or herring.

4. Protect the beaches

By 2050 there could be more plastic in the sea than fish and leaving waste on the beach means that it’s likely to end up in the ocean and destroy marine life. When you leave the beach after a lovely sunny day, make sure that you’re only leaving your footprints.

By 2050 there could be more plastic in the sea than fish

– Use sea-safe sun-cream! Two of the most frequently used ingredients in sun cream, oxybenzone and octinoxate, are deadly to corals and causes them to bleach, which can be fatal. However, you can use reef-safe sun cream that doesn’t include these ingredients which is especially important in tropical areas.

– There are green alternatives to most products out there – did you know that you can buy eco-friendly surf boards? Even greener picnic blankets and sandals, so watch out for eco-friendly substitutes before heading to the beach this summer.

– Clean up your local beaches, helping to clear small and easily forgotten debris will prevent it from flying into the ocean.

Have an eco-friendly barbecue

5. Conserve water

Conserving water saves energy, which is needed to filter, heat and pump water into homes, so reducing the amount of water you use daily will reduce your carbon footprint. Maintaining water in our ecosystems helps to keep aquatic habitats full of fish species and other animals like otters.

There are lots of ways to easily save little bits of water here and there, it all adds up.

– Turn the tap off while brushing your teeth. A running tap can waste more than six litres of water per minute

– Use a bowl in the sink when washing fruit, vegetables, or dishes. You can then use the waste water to water your plants.

– Check your property regularly for leaks on your internal plumbing.

6. Donate and volunteer

There are hundreds of different charities dedicated to bettering the state of the ocean, who do amazing work but run on funds donated by kind people around the world. It is easier than ever to click a few buttons and donate as little as £1 to ocean conservation. Alternatively, get stuck in and volunteer for beach clean-ups, lectures and campaigns.

Some links you may find useful:

Donate – Coast Magazine has a good roundup of organisations where your money would be most welcome

Volunteering opportunities – check this link on the Marine Conservation Soc site

Volunteering – get involved with beach cleans. Find your nearest clean-up gang on the Beach Cleans site

Fancy diving a bit deeper into longer term plans for the oceans? Read the MCS strategy booklet

7. Educate yourself!

Immerse yourself in media and literature to expand your knowledge of the ocean. The more you know about the sea and how your carbon footprint affects the life inside it, the easier it will be to take small steps towards the rejuvenation of ocean life. Some further reading…

World Ocean Day

WWF (World Wildlife Fund)

GVI

Blue Marine Foundation

Ocean Conservation Trust

Millie Owens

www.titlemedia.co.uk

The post 7 ways you can help to save the oceans appeared first on Silver Magazine.